Sometimes it’s better to just share…

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I’ve been bad. At writing. At least so far this year. The funny thing is, that I was focused and determined more than ever to write a lot in 2012. And then it became 2012 and I didn’t do it.

The good news is that it still is 2012 and I’ve still got 10 more months of it. The other good news is that this year is a leap year and that means it has bought me one extra day in February to procrastinate and put up a post before the month officially ends.

But I haven’t been sitting around eating bon-bons all day either. Sometimes it’s nachos, chips or wine and scotch…

But kidding (maybe not) aside, the very thing I set out to do, I didn’t do. Why is that? Is it Murphy’s Law (who is this Murphy guy anyway?), the Law of Attraction, Newton’s Third Law? Maybe it’s not any of those things and maybe it’s as simple as listening to Nike and ‘Just Do(ing) It’.

The thing is, ‘Just Do It‘ wouldn’t be such a compelling slogan if we all ‘did it’ all the time. It’s compelling because we don’t, and it’s motivating because we should. Could you imagine if they had ads that said, “Just go eat some French fries – you deserve it!”, or maybe something like, “Procrastination is the key to success!” Or how about something simpler like, “Just Don’t“. Knowing me, they’d probably have the opposite effect. I’d probably be more likely to not eat French fries, not procrastinate and just do it if I saw ads like that. Maybe that says more about me than it does about human nature. Apparently I’ve got a little rebel girl inside, and she doesn’t like listening to anyone, including myself.   Continue reading →

A Poem for the New Year

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I wrote this poem several months ago. It was during a time when I was feeling doubtful and afraid. I just wanted someone to tell me that everything was going to be okay, or somehow magically know for sure that it would be.

I think we all go through times like this, some more often than others. Nevertheless, the truth is that you’re not alone in that. It can feel lonely, like you’re the only one in the world who could ever know or be feeling what you’re feeling.

During these moments, putting my pen to paper is sometimes the only thing that makes sense. This is what I wrote when I was going though such a time. It hasn’t felt right for me to share it until now. I think it seems like a fitting way to start the New Year: with hope and truth and love.

Here’s to 2012!

Sometimes I wish I had a little crystal ball
skip to the end
know it all

But then I stop and think, reconsider
Maybe I don’t want to know
Maybe it’s for the best.

Would I be disappointed?
Would I be surprised?
Would it be everything and more, that
I’ve fantasized.

Sometimes I wish I had a little crystal ball
see what’s next
know it all

But then again I don’t
Because I live for the mystery
I thrive in what could be.

But today I’m sad and scared
because I’m worried I’m nothing special
Afraid to skip to the end
Afraid to make it official.

But I don’t have a crystal ball
And I will never know it all

And that’s the beauty of it.

The mystery to live for
I will never know
what’s behind the door
Until I walk through it

Open it up and see
Unveil a little of the mystery
Stop doubting, start walking
It’s never too late for bravery.

Be brave and dare
Dare to live your life

There’s more than you can imagine
There’s more, you’ll see

Bye bye crystal ball
              you don’t know it all

Thank God that I can’t see
what’s ahead of me

Because when I’m sad and scared
and afraid to dare
I create what I’m afraid to see
Instead of letting the Mystery
unfold and surprise me

And He has more imagination
              than I could ever imagine.  So,

So long crystal ball
I don’t need you at all
Because all I see
is my reflection back at me

There’s no magic, it’s just a trick

And I know the Truth
the Truth won’t make me sick

The truth is, this world
we don’t need crystal balls, know it alls
that’s silly

We need hope, we need Truth, we need love.

We need to believe
Or we will buy the first thing we see
Cause we won’t know any better
if we don’t believe in better

So better is what we need
better is what we need
to believe

 

It is Within you Already.

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I was sitting in Starbucks this afternoon trying to do some work and ‘figure out my life’ when I stumbled upon blogger/author Gwen Bell‘s website. As soon as I began reading, I felt a fog lift and everything immediately felt clear to me – though it could be because she lives in Mexico and her pictures are full of sun and happy things. Yes, that probably helped clear the fog for sure.

This is what I wrote after I read her article:

That is it. The crux of everything I want to do. There are many more things that can go on the list, but pared down, naked, this is it.

At the moment I am going through a shift. I’ve been pursuing something that I love for the last three years, but I don’t know if I love it more than this: writing.

I never knew that before. But then again, up until this last year, I didn’t write. I wrote in my journal sometimes and wrote poetry once in a blue moon but that was it. And now that I’m doing it, it feels right. Nothing I did before felt right. I thought maybe there was something wrong with me. Maybe I wasn’t hardworking enough or maybe I was just lazy or lacking talent. But I knew it felt wrong and often times I came to the conclusion that maybe I was just wrong.

I don’t believe that anymore. Now that I know what ‘right’ feels like, I can’t un-know it.

If you don’t know what that is for you, don’t fret. It’s within you already. You may have to take some time to ask yourself some good questions. I asked myself this one recently, “If you knew you only had 6 months to live, what would you do? And what would you stop doing?” You may surprise yourself if you answer honestly. I did.

I read this really great article recently by Danielle LaPorte about “respecting your natural ability and your never, never, evers.” Take a look at it.

What feels right for you?

What is your never, never ever?

 

Your Inner Voice. Saboteur or Superhero?

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Most of the time I think of myself as a fairly productive and organized individual. Yes, I think it would be fair to say that. I make lists and cross things off and as a result, I’ve arrive at the conclusion that I can be quite organized and productive. But then again, maybe I’m not. I was recently challenged on the topic of time management. And though perhaps, I don’t manage it poorly, perhaps I don’t manage my time very well either. Yes I make lists and cross things off on my list all the time. But no one sees my lists except for me. I suppose that buying bread at Cobbs, taking a shower, making breakfast and emptying the dishwasher are all things that are good to do, but they’re really nothing to be that proud of.  And why is it, that I do the least important things first and often don’t get around to doing the more important things if at all?

—-

Five weeks ago, I started meditating. I had never done it before but after listening to a particularly inspiring podcast, I decided to try it. I thought, well… it can’t hurt right? And it didn’t and it hasn’t. It’s only helped. It sounds hokey saying it, that I ‘meditate‘.  But the fact is, is that life has been better since I began taking 10 minutes in the morning to think, reflect, envision, be grateful and be still. I actually find myself excited to get out of bed in the morning so that I can have those 10 minutes alone sit in my living room and look out the window and then look upward and inward and be still.

And since I began doing all this thinking, one of the things that I’ve been thinking a lot about, is the concept of abundance. About how the Universe is infinite and full of love and how it is so very abundant. About how it gives me what I believe of it and how what I believe of it is actually what I am asking of it and how I better be careful what I’m believing of it because that is exactly what it will give me.  Continue reading →

October Sabbatical

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Hi Friends,

I will be taking a blog sabbatical for the month of October.

Lately I have been feeling depleted. It could be the seasonal changes or personal changes or a combination of many different things, but it is clear that I need to take a break in order to recharge and reflect, and figure out what I need to do and where I want to be so that I can continue moving forward intentionally.

I know everyone is very busy, myself included. I have a few blogs I subscribe to as well and I recently noticed that when I received the emails in my inbox, I was just too busy to read them. It made me realize that posting every week probably isn’t necessary and posting a little less often could be just as good.  Therefore, in November, I will be writing posts every 2 weeks instead of every week.

It has been such a privilege to write these posts over the last 8 months and I am grateful to everyone who has read them and has appreciated them.  I love writing and will continue to write and will be coming back in November.

Here is a wonderful quote that I read recently and will be writing down and posting on my wall. It’s a gooder.

“If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; be kind anyway. If you are successful, you will win some false friends and true enemies; succeed anyway. If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; be honest and frank anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; be happy anyway. The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; do good anyway… You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; it was never between you and them anyway.”
- Mother Teresa

See you in November.

Love Leana

On Surfing and Finding the Flow…

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“Everything in the universe has a purpose. Indeed, the invisible intelligence that flows through everything in a purposeful fashion is also flowing through you.”
-Dr. Wayne Dyer

Today I was a traitor….

Instead of sitting at one of many, many Starbucks locations around, I am here at a different coffee shop. “Waves” to be specific. As I was pondering about what to write today, I started thinking about surfing. Maybe being at a coffee shop called “Waves” had something to do with it…

I’ve surfed a few times. Once in Ireland, once in Maui and once in Tofino – probably a few of the most beautiful places in the world to surf. I don’t think it’s my kind of thing though. I think that I love the idea of surfing more than I actually like surfing.

Those of you who are hardcore surfers probably have a couple different responses to that statement. Perhaps you are thinking something like, “Well, that’s because you haven’t really given it a good go yet. Your problem is that gave up too soon.” To which I say, True, it is possible. But I don’t enjoy snorting saltwater and being flung around in the ocean.

On the other hand, you just might be thinking more along the lines of, “Good! The less people in the water, the better! We don’t want newbie-wannabe surfers around anyway.” To which I think, Well whatever. I don’t wanna be where I’m not appreciated, so there! Getting naked in a cold, raining parking lot and squeezing into a wet suit in order to jump into frigid waters is not my kind of fun anyway. You can have it!

Or you might not be thinking any of those things at all and I’m just making silly assumptions. Nevertheless, it’s clear that surfing is not really my thing. Though sometimes I wish it were. It just sounds so cool. And I love anything ‘cool’, including the word itself. When I was in the fourth grade, the in-thing was to start exclusive clubs for no reason at all other than to be part of an exclusive club. I really wanted to name our club the “Cool Club”, but apparently the others didn’t have to same affinity for the word cool as I did.  Continue reading →

Storage Wars

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 “Many of us spend our whole lives running from feeling with the mistaken belief that you cannot bear the pain. But you have already borne the pain. What you have not done is feel all you are beyond the pain.”
-Saint Bartholomew

Heaping bundles of hurt. That’s what we are.

It’s what determines almost everything we do or do not do – our wounds. And when the hurt gets to be too much, we push it away, tossing it into a safe place, a storage locker for the heart. Over the years, layers of dust build and we forget that we ever put anything there in the first place.

It is unavoidable – the hurt. It’s comes with the territory of being alive. We’ve all gotten great at pretending with that too. When someone asks us how we are doing, we smile and shrug and say, “fine thanks” and quickly turn it around and ask how they are doing.

We often don’t even know these storage lockers exist anymore, yet a large part of what we say or do in life stems from items buried in our forgotten lockers.

Over the last 10 years or so, I’ve noticed something with myself. It feels like I’ve become increasingly numb. Not necessarily numb to others and their needs or pain, but numb to myself. As an actor, it is very frustrating. Instead of using myself and some of my experiences, I’d often imagine and create elaborate stories for the characters I was playing because I felt numb to my own experiences. I didn’t understand why I had a hard time thinking of real-life parallels and I would often wonder, Is this what being healed from hurt feels like? Kinda numbish?  Continue reading →

Facing the Financial Facts

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“Formal education will make you a living; self-education will make you a fortune.”
-Jim Rohn

Don't be chicken!

Recently, I was advised to pick up the book, The Smart Cookies: Guide to Making More Dough and Getting Out of Debt. The book features the stories of five women who get together and go on a ‘debt diet’ and over the course of a year, achieve their financial goals and begin truly living the lives of their dreams.

Sounds like a pretty good idea to me. I want to live the life of my dreams, but…. go on a debt diet? That doesn’t sound too appealing. In fact, a diet of any sort doesn’t sound very appealing to me, it never has.

Nevertheless, I bought the book. As I was deciding this afternoon, whether or not to start reading it, a flurry of thoughts entered my mind. My first thought was, “Leana, you’re not doing so bad, you don’t really need to go on a debt diet.” And then I heard this other quiet and knowing voice and it said, yes you do. To which I argued, “No but I’m fine, really.” And again, I heard the quiet voice; no you’re not.

And then it asked this question, “Why are you resisting this so much?” And the same quiet voice answered it’s own question: “You’re resisting because you won’t be able to pretend anymore. And you like pretending, but it won’t do you any good. Just trust me. And don’t think someone or something’s gonna come along and save you. They won’t. You have to save yourself. Just trust me.”

Yes, I am admitting that I like to pretend. Once upon a time – when I got my first student loan – I started pretending and it felt so good. I had moved to a new city and was able to stay with family (which meant free accommodation) and I had money in the bank. It was more money than I’d ever had and the most money I’d ever been responsible for. And to top it all off, I lived beside a giant shopping mall. I was eighteen and ‘rich’ and lived beside a mall. It was a dream come true. I’d never felt so free.  Continue reading →

Courage isn’t Automatic

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“Do the thing you fear to do and keep on doing it… that is the quickest and surest way ever yet discovered to conquer fear.”
- Dale Carnegie

I take acting classes and have been ‘training’ for the last three years. You’d think something that I’ve been doing consistently for three years would be easy-peasy by now. You’d think. Not so.

Last week I sat in class, terrified. Though I memorized my scene and mentally worked through some details at a coffee shop, I didn’t get much of a chance to physically practice it, hence the nervousness. So, I sat in class and avoided my turn as long as possible – all the while considering other options: faking a sudden illness resulting in a desperate need to get home immediately, or having to leave early because I forgot I had to do something very, very important. I decided that neither of these were good options since I would probably end up feeling much worse in the end if I gave in to cowardice . So I went with the lesser of two evils and stayed.

Naturally, I went last and when it was finally my turn, I slowly sauntered up to the spot in front of the camera and in front of my peers. I was petrified, scared that I would start my scene and get completely lost and everyone would see that I actually have absolutely no idea what I’m doing.  Continue reading →

From Clutter to Connections

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“Our most basic common link is that we all inhabit this small planet. We all breathe the same air. We all cherish our children’s future. And we are all mortal.”
- John F. Kennedy

 

Some thoughts…

Last week when I was writing about de-cluttering my house, I felt as if I wasn’t able to fully express why it was so necessary. I felt the need very deeply – but it didn’t seem that I was able to find the right words to accurately describe it, the grand purpose of it – until last night that is. I was reading my latest issue of O Magazine when I came upon an article featuring a past guest on Oprah, the organization guru, Peter Walsh.

I am paraphrasing here, but he said that organization is about more than just aesthetics. Having an organized space fosters creativity, like approaching a blank canvas every morning. I love that. The idea of your space being organized so that it frees you up, that it could be like a fresh canvas, harboring unlimited possibilities. On the other hand, Walsh said that having a messy space makes you feel overwhelmed before you even start working.

That is exactly how I was feeling before the big clean up last week. Every morning, I felt overwhelmed before I even started anything. On a side note, I just now went back and re-read my entry from last week and I’m a little surprised that I wasn’t as inept at describing my feelings as I originally thought. What I wasn’t as able to accurately describe though, was the reason why it is important to clear the clutter. Peter Walsh was better able to do that. Continue reading →

Clear the clutter

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 “More important than learning how to recall things is finding ways to
forget things that are cluttering the mind.”
 -Eric Butterworth


Over these next four days I am cleaning up the clutter. Lately I have been feeling overwhelmed, some days till the point of tears. I sit and look at it all and I don’t know where to start and what to do. I called my mother-in-law a couple of weeks ago and woefully described my utter helplessness with mess and she generously offered to come over and spend a few days cleaning, clearing and organizing with me.

I am so grateful.

The thing with stuff is, that it crowds you. It sneaks in unsuspectingly and little by little, it snuffs everything out in it’s path. It’s like weeds; slowly inching in, crowding and choking the life out of everything in its path. It’s a silent killer – killer of creativity, order and peace.

The Merriam-Webster definition of clutter is this: to fill or cover with scattered or disordered things that impede movement or reduce effectiveness. That is precisely what clutter does, it impedes you and reduces your ‘effectiveness’. Whatever the effect you are wanting is entirely up to you, but the fact is that clutter reduces it. Continue reading →

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

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“There are as many nights as days, and the one is just as long as the other in the year’s course. Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word ‘happy’ would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness.”
-Carl Jung

Seasons change, people change. Life is always changing, evolving. Some days are beautiful and bright, other days are cloudy, dark and desperately unclear. Some days you know exactly where you are going and what you are doing, and some days it’s hard to get out of bed and brush your hair, some days are full of despair.

On the dark days, it’s easy to succumb it. It’s easy to say time-out and pull the covers over your head and say “Wake me up when it’s sunny again!” That’s what I’ve been wanting to do. Everyday this week, I’ve been wanting to hide and only come out when everything is alright again. But the thing is, it has been sunny. Other than yesterday, it’s been beautiful and bright pretty much every day this week. The darkness instead, has been inside of me, and all I’ve wanted to do is hide in it. And I did. I had my hiding moments this week. Moments that I let myself lie in bed just a little longer, moments when I just let the tears fall and moments when I just sat and let myself feel overwhelmed.

The harder part was not knowing where all this was coming from. Maybe that’s what happens sometimes, like the seasons changing, my body needs to change. Last Tuesday I woke up and everything was heavy and I could not do anything about it. Sometimes things like that just happen I think. My usual sunny, positive attitude flew out the window and everything felt bleak for the first time in a long time. It’s a terrible feeling, this bleakness. Continue reading →

Giving up the fight without giving in.

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“Anything I’ve ever done that ultimately was worthwhile… initially scared me to death.”  -Betty Bender

I wish I could see into the future sometimes. But I realize that when I find myself wanting to see into the future, it is because I am feeling fearful and down on myself. When I am feeling great and positive and hopeful, I don’t worry about the future. This is not one of those times.

Some people are doers. A doer is what I strive to be. A doer I am naturally not. It seems with everything that I manage to do, I am by nature, blessed with an added layer of fear and trepidation. To do anything, I have to go deep into the the jungle of my mind and karate-chop all the villains and bad thoughts I have about myself. Then when I am finished doing that, I am often too tired to take the next step. I have to rest my inner-ninja before moving on. This process can take, oh, months, maybe weeks if I am lucky.

Let me tell you, it gets tiring.

I am tired today. I am tired of fearing and doubting and exhausted from karate chopping. Sometimes it feels as if I’m damned if I do and damned if I don’t. But I do know this, that the pain of doing something I fear is less than the pain of not doing it; that the act of doing is makes me more alive, that not facing it and not doing, doesn’t.

Earlier this evening I read Seth Godin’s blog about the ‘heckler’ within us, how most of us have one and how it cannot be eliminated and how engaging the heckler often doesn’t work. Maybe that’s why I am so tired right now. I’ve been kicking and flailing wildly at my heckler – also commonly known as fear, doubt or ‘the voice of reason’. And while that may keep Mr. Heckler at an arm’s and fully-extended-leg’s distance away from me, I always have to rest and catch my breath after fear-fighting sessions. It leaves me pooped.

It is clear I need to be more efficient with where I direct my energy or I will not have much left to actually do the thing I was wanting to do in the first place. It is clear I need a new strategy. In an interview with author Steven Pressfield on the topic of fighting inner-resistance and his aptly-named book ‘Do the Work’, he says that you almost have to just “put your ass where your heart wants to be.”

I can tell you right now that it works. I put my ‘ass’ in this chair tonight because my heart wants to be here, writing these words even though I am tired – tired from being fearful and tired of fighting it all day.

And though ninja’s have do have a place and purpose, when it comes to fear, sometimes it is better not to fight. Sometimes it is better to save your energy and walk past it.

Sometimes it is more effective to find out where your heart wants to be and ‘put your back(end) into it.’

 

Post Vacation Pondering

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No man needs a vacation so much as the person who has just had one.  ~Elbert Hubbard

I love vacation.

Last night, Shaun and I got back from a week long vacation. We spent a few lovely nights in one of our favorite places, Cannon Beach, Oregon. As we pulled into town, I turned off the music and held my breath. It wasn’t long before I felt a surge of warmth rush up, wanting to spill out of my eyes. I didn’t cry, but I could have. The place is so beautiful and majestic and calm. As frenzied as I can get and as much as it is possible to bring that bad energy with me, beauty wins. It is impossible not to let it. I could throw all of that busy, frenetic energy at the sea-tinged air and it would happily swallow it up and spit back its beauty at me. It’s a battle I’m thrilled to lose.

A mini-holiday was exactly what I needed – to get away from both daily life and my own mind and be able to relax and unwind. As vacation came to an end and we were arriving back at home, I thought that I would be able to bring some of that renewed energy back with me. But instead, something else was in its place. It felt like a little ball in between my stomach and diaphragm. I recognized this feeling. Anxiety.

I’m befuddled. I came home from vacation and I felt overwhelmed and I wanted the world to stop just for a moment so that I could get a hold of myself, get my footing. But wasn’t my holidays supposed to do that for me? Continue reading →

A time to change…

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“Life belongs to the living, and he who lives must be prepared for changes.”
-Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Change is certain. That is something we can all depend on whether we like it or not. I used to wish that I could put moments of my life into a little box so that I could open it up as I choose, and go back any time I wanted and revisit the moment and experience everything all over again. Sometimes I knew change was happening and I didn’t want it to and I did everything I could to fight it. I held on and held on until the thing changed despite me but then changed into something uglier than if I had just let it go to evolve naturally as it should. I’ve learned that fighting change is the least helpful thing to do when things are inevitably changing. I’ve learned that if you allow it and perhaps even welcome it, it can be a wonderful thing.

In my early 20′s, I discovered the goodness in changing. I moved away to different cities and met different people and flitted away to my next location and adventure in a heartbeat. I liked to think that nothing could hold me down. I became addicted to change. The newness of something gave me a sort of rush and when things became normal, I would begin to feel anxious and restless and that would be the precursor to searching for my next adventure.

As much as it seemed on the outside that I welcomed and even sought change, one thing that I wasn’t doing, was allowing for others to change – though I wasn’t aware of it at the time. You see, I had them in my my little box. I wanted to be able to visit with them anytime and as I went off on my adventures – though I was doing plenty of changing on my own- I wanted my relationships to be exactly the same. I wanted my friendships and relationships to be what I had always remembered them to be and when I discovered they weren’t, it was devastating. I took it personally and felt wounded and tried as best I could to force it back into the box but it didn’t work.   Continue reading →

Finding Your Passion and Purpose

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“If you don’t know what your passion is, realize that one reason for your
existence on earth is to find it.”
-Oprah Winfrey


At the heart of it, we are creative beings. From the moment we draw our first picture or form our first words, we are speaking or drawing something into existence that wasn’t there before. Life is one big canvas, every thought, every action, every intent and with every step we take, we are creating the life we are living whether we are conscious of it or not.

Recently I’ve had many conversations with friends who are all different ages and at different stages in their lives. There is a common thread amongst all of these conversations: passion; what it is, what is theirs and how go about finding it and doing it. I am always very excited when this topic crops up. I am excited about what this means for someone; about what it means for this world. It turns life from something passive and unconsciously lived to something alive; it becomes active and filled with intent and purpose.

Some people are born and it becomes very clear very quickly that they are gifted. I recently watched a video of Little Richard as a child and it was very clear that he was very gifted from a very early age. Some people know when they are very young, exactly what they want to do whether it be dance, or music or to be the President of the United States of America. I think we all have that inner-knowing to a certain extent but not all people listen to it or trust it.

That inner knowledge is very clear to us when we are small. We know exactly what we like or hate, who we like and don’t like and we don’t try and hide it. Have you ever seen a baby eat a spoonful of something they don’t like? It is very funny but more importantly, it is truthful. As children, we haven’t yet learned to put on masks, we haven’t yet learned to live our lives according to others’ expectations. We take a bite of broccoli and it tastes bad and we show it. As we grow up, we learn what other people expect of us, we learn to say please and thank you and say ‘excuse me’ when do something offensive like burp or fart. But somewhere in between our first bite of broccoli and adolescence lies truth, your truth. Continue reading →

One Step at a Time

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“Inch by inch, life’s a cinch. Yard by yard, life is hard.” – Anonymous

I get overwhelmed easily. This is no secret. Well… perhaps it was more of a secret before but it certainly isn’t anymore.

I get overwhelmed by mess and anything in disarray. Any mess on the outside makes me feel messy inside and I can’t concentrate. I get overwhelmed by working too much, so I don’t. I even get overwhelmed when I see construction of any sort because all I see is chaos, clutter and debris, and in that moment, I can’t envision the intended outcome. I get overwhelmed when Shaun moves the furniture around in the bedroom and I have to change dressers or drawers. I also get overwhelmed when I go hiking because I’m afraid I can’t finish, that it will be too hard for me.

Mind you, the hike I’m referring to is the Grouse Grind in Vancouver. It’s a 2.9 km hike straight up Grouse Mountain which translates to traveling 2800 ft up the mountain and 2830 stairs . I’m not just being a complete baby when I say it is utterly grueling; at least it is for me and probably 85% of the population.

On a side note, last week I hiked the mountain and at the top, I asked the man in front of me how long he thought the line for the Gondola (that’s the only way to get down) would take since I’d never seen a lineup so long. He said he didn’t know but earlier it was much shorter and took no time at all. This begged the question. “Earlier?” He then proceeded to tell me that he usually hikes the mountain twice; once to challenge himself and then he does it a second time to just relax and enjoy. At first I was impressed and then it turned to irritation.  Continue reading →

Living Presently.

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“I never think of the future.  It comes soon enough.”
-Albert Einstein

I am just going to start off by confessing. I didn’t finish the book. I tried, I really did. I did however, get to page 93 of the 218 pages. That’s an accomplishment right? In case you missed the last blog, I’m talking about my challenge to myself last week to stop thinking and start doing.

The good news is that I get the book for another week. The first time around, the book was borrowed on Shaun’s card and since it was due today, I came up with the brilliant idea to ‘return’ the book and then take it out on my card. There is still much knowledge to be gleaned from this book and if I can help it (minus my unsuccessful effort this week to finish it), I will finish it!

The book I am referring to is, “The Procrastination Equation: How to stop putting things off and start getting things done” by Piers Steel.

As I am sitting here writing and reading what I’ve written so far, I feel sheepish and exposed. I admit, I do feel like a bit of a failure because I was supposed to be accountable to both you and the North Vancouver Public Library but like a typical procrastinator, I managed to find my way around the deadline and buy some time. You can imagine my slight embarrassment today when I approached the desk at the library asking to return a book on procrastination in order to take it back out again because I hadn’t finished reading it.  Continue reading →